I finished work at 3pm on Friday afternoon. I made plans with a friend from my old department to have our nails done and grab a bite to eat. As you may know, it's near on impossible to get your nails done and talk on the phone, so when I was mid buff and my phone rang, I let it go through to voice mail.
After my nails had dried I dug my hand into my bag to retrieve my phone. The missed call from earlier had been made from a private number, I assumed it was someone calling from home or work. I dialed my mail box to listen to the message. It was full of static and I could barely hear what the voice on the other end was saying.
I replayed the message on loud speaker to decypher what was being said. From what I could pick up, it was some woman named Jody who was accusing me of sleeping with her boyfriend! She advised that I should stop sleeping with him or she'd kill me. She ended with, "Got that Ok? Thanks, bye!". So polite of her.
I laughed so hard I nearly pissed my pants! Who the fuck is this crazy bitch!? How did she get my number? And more importantly, who the fuck is it that I have supposedly fucked? I must have sexsomnia, because I haven't had sex with anyone other than myself in over a year that I am aware of!
If anyone knows an crazy, angry bitch named Jody, who's other half has been stepping out on her, please let her kmow that it's not me that fucked him, but maybe she should throw him the occasional BJ and maybe, just maybe, he wouldn't need to cheat on her with someone like me!
