I needed a new bicycle. My last one got taken without my permission. Get yourself in a comfy chair, and I'll set the scene for you...
...Comfy? Good. Now I can continue!
I was riding reliable old, Huffy to a Mexican restaurant for dinner one evening a few months back with a good friend Miss How Do You Do. It was early evening, the sun was going down, birds were settling into their roosts for the night, when all of a sudden, the left crank and pedal assembly of my two-wheeled vehicle fell off! My close friends know that I have a very quick temper and even the slightest thing that most people would just shrug off sets me over the edge.
I picked up the bicycle and threw it accross the nature strip in a fit of rage, I threw the crank into some bushes and stomped up the street towards the restaurant. I was in a bad mood because I was hungry, my bike has just fallen to pieces so I kept my head down and used the Foot Falcon to get to where it was I needed to be. My plan was to walk to dinner. Enjoy a fantastic vegetarian la combination with the ever lovely and composed Miss How Do You Do, walk back to where I had left the bike, push it home and fix it in the morning. But no, when we got back to the place I had left my bike I was shocked to discover it was gone! Someone had stolen my broken bicycle! Who would ever do such a thing? I was furious! I picked up the detatched crank and threw it as hard as I could down the centre of the street - I'm a girl and throw like one so it didn't get far!
When Miss How Do You Do had calmed me down and defused the situation we continued the walk back to her place. It was late, getting cold, and now my grumpiness has returned ten-fold. All I wanted to do was to get into my 5.7 litre V8 car and go home to bed and forget about the fact that some jerk had stollen my broken bike!
I broiled on the fact that somebody had stolen a broken bike and not bothered to look for the missing part. Did they walk it back to their Aladdin's cave of stolen treasure? Did a one leggered pirate claim ownership of my abandoned fragmented former chariot? Over the next few days I decided it was time to replace the good old Huffy with one more fitting to my personality. I decided I needed a vintage bike.
I started trawling the internet - eBay mostly - for a vintage bike. I came to a realisation that owning a vintage bike would be much like owning a vintage car. Lots of maintenance that would more than likely prove to be quite costly. I found this amazing bike that looked like a vintage beach cruiser, but was in fact brand, spanking new! Eureka! I wanted to buy it as soon as I had laid my eyes on it.
She was beautiful. Powder blue, curved frame, tan leatherlook saddle and hand grips, 7 gears, cane basket on the front and mudguards. I was in love... again! This time with a bike and not a boy! I named her Madame.
...Comfy? Good. Now I can continue!
I was riding reliable old, Huffy to a Mexican restaurant for dinner one evening a few months back with a good friend Miss How Do You Do. It was early evening, the sun was going down, birds were settling into their roosts for the night, when all of a sudden, the left crank and pedal assembly of my two-wheeled vehicle fell off! My close friends know that I have a very quick temper and even the slightest thing that most people would just shrug off sets me over the edge.
I picked up the bicycle and threw it accross the nature strip in a fit of rage, I threw the crank into some bushes and stomped up the street towards the restaurant. I was in a bad mood because I was hungry, my bike has just fallen to pieces so I kept my head down and used the Foot Falcon to get to where it was I needed to be. My plan was to walk to dinner. Enjoy a fantastic vegetarian la combination with the ever lovely and composed Miss How Do You Do, walk back to where I had left the bike, push it home and fix it in the morning. But no, when we got back to the place I had left my bike I was shocked to discover it was gone! Someone had stolen my broken bicycle! Who would ever do such a thing? I was furious! I picked up the detatched crank and threw it as hard as I could down the centre of the street - I'm a girl and throw like one so it didn't get far!
When Miss How Do You Do had calmed me down and defused the situation we continued the walk back to her place. It was late, getting cold, and now my grumpiness has returned ten-fold. All I wanted to do was to get into my 5.7 litre V8 car and go home to bed and forget about the fact that some jerk had stollen my broken bike!
I broiled on the fact that somebody had stolen a broken bike and not bothered to look for the missing part. Did they walk it back to their Aladdin's cave of stolen treasure? Did a one leggered pirate claim ownership of my abandoned fragmented former chariot? Over the next few days I decided it was time to replace the good old Huffy with one more fitting to my personality. I decided I needed a vintage bike.
I started trawling the internet - eBay mostly - for a vintage bike. I came to a realisation that owning a vintage bike would be much like owning a vintage car. Lots of maintenance that would more than likely prove to be quite costly. I found this amazing bike that looked like a vintage beach cruiser, but was in fact brand, spanking new! Eureka! I wanted to buy it as soon as I had laid my eyes on it.
She was beautiful. Powder blue, curved frame, tan leatherlook saddle and hand grips, 7 gears, cane basket on the front and mudguards. I was in love... again! This time with a bike and not a boy! I named her Madame.
Since falling in love with my new flame, we have been on many adventures. I love that I - the unfit, fat, non-exercising person - can now ride my vintage inspired bicycle to Williamstown, do 'the lap' and head home again all without whinging about being tired, exhausted, puffed or out of breath - I put it all down to giving up the dirty cigs five months and fourdays ago.
I heart Madame.
I heart Madame.
Excellent, I can't stop laughing! xx
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