Monday, May 20, 2013

How many is too many?

 
Yesterday I watched a movie called 'What's your Number?'. It's about a chick in her thirties, living in Boston; who's having a mini mid-life crisis. Her younger sister is getting married before her, her dropkick boyfriend recently dumped her and she has just lost her job. On the shame train home from losing her job, she digs through a box of personal items she comes across a magazine with an article that states that the average number of sexual partners for American women is 10.5. The article also goes on to say that women who have had twenty or more sexy-time friends will have difficulty finding a husband. She quickly digs through her box and starts writing down her list. She comes to a final number - 19. 

She decides that the next person she sleeps with will be her future husband. She pretty much fucks that up the same day by sleeping with her ball scratching, finger sniffing ex boss. She cannot believe what she's done and so that she doesn't get over 20 cocks, she decides to revisit them all. She enlists the help of her man whore neighbour to track down the original 19 fellas and in the process starts falling for him. She refuses to sleep with him as she sees him as another time wasting douche. Long story short, they find all of her exes. None of which are right for her to be with as they are either dead, married/engaged or just plain old weird (puppet guy). She eventually gives into her feelings for the man whore neighbour and allegedly the live happily ever after.

It got me to thinking, how many cocks for one girl is too many? 5? 10? 15? 20? 40? 100? From what I can remember from similar what's your magic number conversations my posse of girls, it seems we average between the mid teens to late twenties. We are all just into our thirties, assume we all had our cherries popped at age 15. This means at this stage in our lives we have been rooting like rabbits for at least fifteen years. Assume that most girls start out with a teenage love. A boyfriend they are with until they turn say, twenty. There's 1 cock and 5 years. Once we turn 18 and discover booze and partying our number of sexual partners dramatically rises. I'd say that in your early twenties a chick could easily sleep with at least 10 guys. Drunken one-night stands were pretty common in my day. I doubt that I could even give an accurate number of how many people I've slept with. 

I was somewhat a good girl until my ex broke up with me. He was my number 12. I went a bit boy-crazy after him and at age 26 after thinking I was going to be planning a wedding and spending the rest of my life with this one fella, the picture in my head was shattered and I found myself single, living out of home with my promiscuous, gay best friend. It was at this time that I discovered online dating. Starting a new relationship was the last thing on my mind I just wanted to fuck my little heart out to get my mind off the wanker that broke it.

Online dating is like shooting fish in a barrel. I must have clocked up at least ten to fifteen cocks in about 6 months. I can't remember the exact number (or names). Between my housemate and I, the front door of our house was like a revolving door of a busy office building in the city. There were dudes coming and going at all times of the day and night. Ahh, the joys of shift work, giving you the flexibility for a cheeky midweek rendezvous here and there. Bliss!

It was always safe sex. I knew that banging some random nameless guy was not worth contracting an STD for. I've calmed down a lot since then. That was a wild 18 months. My promiscuity came to an abrupt end when the house mate and I had a fight and I moved back home with my family. There's not a faster way on earth to kill your sex life than to move back home with your family!

The long and short of it all, I don't know how many cocks I've had. I estimate it's somewhere in the region of 25 to maybe 35 but probably more. Too many? What do you think? What's your number?

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